Intro verse 1 Destiny was calling Monday afternoon Wednesday, you'll be crawling And you'll pray to be there soon With sports and wine Yeah Sports and wine No, no Interlude verse 2 Some men never grew up Fortunate like you Some men never found out What it takes to be a dude That's sports and wine Yeah Sports and wine No, no, no Interlude Bridge 1 The girls don't understand it What you think is art My, oh, my, we're all impressed How sensitive you are Everybody's talkin' about you now You know it's true 'Cause it always has been sports and wine for you Interlude Instrumental | | | | verse 3 So you ask me how I think I know Just what makes you tick I know what I know y'know I know you make me sick and Sports and wine (do, do-do, do, do-do, do) Oh Sports and wine (do, do-do, do, do-do, do) Bridge 2 The girls don't understand it Anything you say I don't understand it either Guess that makes me gay Everybody's talking 'bout you now You know it's true Instrumental | | | | | | Drum solo Outro | | |

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