I'm A Cheap Drunk

CAPO II INTRO: Well it all began in my high school days when I spent the summer with my cousin Jake We were helpin' his daddy out on the dairy farm Now on Sundays we didn't have to work and one Sunday when his daddy was off to church Jake invited me to share my first six-pack out in the barn He said you take one and I'll have the rest, brother this'll put some hair on your chest So I got on with the hair-growin' and I chugged it down Well you shoulda seen the look in my cousin's eyes when I jumped off the loft 'cause I Thought I could fly I was actin' like a crazy fool runnin' around When his daddy got home and he heard the noise, he come runnin' to the barn to check on us boys He took one look at me and said Bill what's got into you Well he began to pray to get the demons out, and it musta worked cuz when I opened my mouth I lost my demons all over his Sunday suit CHORUS: N/C I'm a cheap drunk, that's what I am (that' what I am) I get tore up on one little can (just one little can) I may not last that long but we'll have fun Have mercy on me, 'cause I'm a cheap drunk INTRO Now I've been this for most of my life, as a matter of fact that's how I met my wife She was sittin' at the bar lookin' like a dream Well I walked right up and said my name is Bill, I could tell by her look she was Less than thrilled But I said honey, do you mind if I buy you a drink She said ok Phil let's have some fun, then the night became a danged marathon She was tossin' 'em back like she was drinkin' ice tea Before long the room started spinnin' 'round, but I was determined I was gonna stand my ground No woman was ever gonna get the best of me Well the last words I slurred were I'll have one more, then somehow I woke up kissin' the floor And to tell you the truth I don't remember the fall But standin' over me was a lady in white, I said what happened and where the hell am I And that's when she introduced herself as Mrs. Bill Engvall CHORUS Have mercy on me, 'cause I'm a cheap drunk N/C SPOKEN: That's right, alright boys it's party time, somebody put another dollar in the jukebox, and we're gonna rock it tonight CHORUS N/C Have mercy on me, 'cause I'm a cheap drunk SPOKEN: That's right boys, I've had my fill, I'm gonna go ugly early, somebody call me a cab, I gotta go