The Jizmo Show

Tripod: It's seven-thirty, kids, he's on again. He'll make you laugh and make you smile, And teach you about blood and bile. (Stop) Gatesy: A creature of non-specified origin. Tripod: Jizmo! ( played over and over for spoken parts) G & S: Yaaaaaaaaaay! Yon: Hey kids, I'm Jizmo! G & S: Yaaaaaaaaaay! Yon: Learning about the human body all starts with me, Jizmo! G & S: Yaaaaaaaaaay! Yon: Why do you cheer every time I say my name? (Pause) Yon: ... Jizmo... G & S: Yaaaaaaaaaay! Yon: I'm a happy-going-easy-larking- Johnny-come-lately, Together with my human friend, Stevo the Surly! Scod: Yaaaaaa-oooooooooh. Gatesy: (Surly) Hi. Yon: He's just finished Macbeth with the Bell Shakespeare company. Gatesy: Yeah, hi. Yon: Come on Stevo, you can do better than that! Gatesy: I went to NIDA, and now I'm doing this... Yon: But you love it, don't you Stevo?! Gatesy: Heath Ledger never even went to acting school. Yon: And my other friend, Jenny Keys! She's half woman, half piano! Go, Jenny, play that piano! (Scod plays a happy tune) ^ ^v ^ ^v ^ ^v ^ ^v ^ ^v ^ ^v ^ ^v ---------------------------------------- -------1----1----1----1----1----1----1-- -------0----0----0----0----0----0----0-- Play ( ^ = Down Stroke ) -------2----2----2----2----2----2----2-- Twice ( v = Up stroke ) ---0-2-3----X----3----X----3----X----3-- -3----------3---------3---------3------- Gatesy: That's a guitar. Yon: That proves looks can be deceiving! Never judge a book by its cover! Gatesy: It even looks like a guitar. Yon: Oh, Stevo! You're so surly! (Back to Verse chords) Scod: Hey Jizmo, what about me? Yon: How could I forget? It's our special guest sponsor, Sergeant Dental Records! He's handy to have in a fire! Scod: Hey kids, brush your teeth with my new brightening, whitening mouthpaste: McGinty's Mouthpaste. That way your teeth will last longer than you will! Yon: Thanks, Captain Dental Records! By the way, kids, just so you don't get your hopes up, this show will purely consist of me introducing characters, with no actual content! That way, we can be classified as "variety", according to the Australian Television Standards Commission. You know what that means, kids? It's more ads for you - within the actual show, as well as in between! Thanks to Jizmo! G & S: Yaaaaaaaaaay! Tripod: Jizmo's got something special for ya, His friends from art school owe him a favour. Yon: By night, they're a whole 'nother band, but we can't say their name on this show. It's a rude word. There is a part of the body in it, though. But today, they're our house band! They're called "The Polyunsaturated Fats"! Scod: (Very high) Thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis... Isn't the highest note we can siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing! Yon: Hey guys, thanks! Well, that's about enough from me, Jizmo! Scod: Yaaaaaay! (Same verse chords as before) Tripod: It's seven-thirty-five, so it's time to go. I hope you've enjoyed the Jizmo Show. We've learnt and had some fun, well, no, we haven't... Jizmo